People constantly complain about how lonely they are and they are tired of being single. Whose fault is that? Of course, their own. They do not know how to find the love of the whole life and save close relations with people. It is not even so much about love but rather about relationships with people. Maybe now it seems to you that all this is nonsense, and as soon as you get money, there will be people, and love will be right there. In fact, even the biggest cynics and egoists get sick eventually of this situation. It is normal to want to be alone from time to time but not to live a lifetime.
In the modern world, many people feel lonely because of being single. And the scale of this problem is growing with each passing day. There are so many reasons for loneliness, but often people do not realize that they are able to overcome this feeling. Loneliness can manifest itself as inner pain, emptiness, a sense of lack of love. And in this regard, a person feels his own uselessness and aimlessness of existence. They are driven by the only strong belief, “I hate being single.”
Are you single, independent, and self-sufficient or are you alone, abandoned, and rejected? These two conditions differ from each other. You should understand that being single does not mean being lonely. Every person sometimes stays alone, and this cannot be avoided, but you can always overcome loneliness.
The feeling of loneliness is often the result of the loss of loved ones, divorce, breakup. When something happens that fundamentally changes the habitual course of life, a spiritual crisis occurs, a person is experiencing mental pain, loneliness, and even despair. Public opinion says that being single is bad. And you, as a decent member of your society, follow this rule. But what is the basis of this assumption?
After all, there is no such thing in nature. Animals can be in the herd or single. And they are well in each state. Then why do people "clutter up" their heads with ideas about the fact that being single is indecent and bad? In fact, there is nothing wrong with being single. A person does not always want to be in society and be a part of a couple. Sometimes people need privacy to recover, think about themselves, spend time doing hobbies, and simply relax. In fact, being single is good because you can devote most of your time to yourself, not to another person.
Find the pros in being single. For example, if you are single, then you are a more discerning person than those who date just anybody. You have more chances to meet a more suitable partner because you are free to choose a person you really like. Family people have stability, and you have a choice. You are free to choose and not to suffer or live monotonously. So, what's wrong with that? If you want to see the positive sides of being single, you will eventually notice that you do not even want to leave it when the possible candidates for your heart appear in your life.
You don’t want to look for future partners in clubs anymore, you are tired and clearly understand that you want to break up with the next "eternal love", which according to the most optimistic forecast will last no longer than 1 month, in order not to suffer in vain. In a word, you are ready for a serious relationship. However, despite your firm intention to find your “happily ever after" in the next few years, you don’t see any hint of future family comfort and other stability in your personal life. And now you are still single and think seriously about, “What are the reasons why I'm single?” Think twice if there are any familiar points in which you can recognize yourself.
You are extremely busy.
Even if there is still a couple of hours a week to rest in your work schedule, you prefer to spend this time alone with yourself or in the company of old friends. Everybody can understand you. Relationships, especially serious ones, require great emotional investment which is not less, by the way, than doing your own business, or any other responsible and hard work. So, it is quite natural that in your free time you prefer to relax in the company of friends to spending your time building a relationship with a potential partner. However, if you still want stability in your personal life, you will have to make a couple of changes in the work schedule.
You are searching for yourself.
Maybe you are going to move to another city in the near future, to learn a new profession, or to start a career from scratch. It is not the best time to build a serious relationship, is it? Do not worry, all in good time. When you have a little more certainty in your life, your goals will cover also a private life.
You don’t have self-confidence.
You do not like the way you look, you do not like what you do, and generally, the relationship with yourself is, frankly, tense. The consequences of such an internal problem are extremely diverse: starting from the inability to make friends, and ending with the unwillingness to fall in love and pay attention to the one who is next to you. It is difficult to struggle with complexes and uncertainty, but you can do that if you really want.
You give morality lessons.
You are single for a reason. First, giving pieces of advice, you put yourself above other people. No matter how much empirical your experience is and it might have changed your whole life radically, nobody cares. Most people do not need your so-called help, they want to communicate with people, they want to be heard but not to learn ways to live better. Moreover, you should not overestimate your abilities: if you are not successful and rich, then no one will listen to you. People will get tired of you and will avoid your morality lessons in every possible way.
You are an egoist in the terminal stage.
Stop thinking that you are the most important person on the planet. Stop focusing only on your desires. Stop thinking only about yourself. People need reciprocity and attention to themselves. So, being single is your natural state. You are too picky.
In life, not everything goes the way you want it. You will not please everyone at least because all people have their own opinion. Deal with it and relax. Otherwise, you will spend the rest of the days in grumbling loneliness, constantly complaining, scolding and thinking about reasons you are single. Nobody likes such people. If they are called into the company, then perhaps due to the sense of compassion or for a certain benefit. People want to communicate, share memories, and not listen to complaints about that only idiots are around and everything is bad. It is quite a lot of negativity around and nobody will want to hear your whining.
You have sex just with anyone.
It's not even about you, it's about your attitude to people. Sex is wonderful, no one argues, and the abundance of partners has not harmed anyone yet. But everywhere there are limits. Living such a life, you begin to view the opposite sex exclusively as the universal evil and a way to satisfy lust, that's all. It seems to you that you have known their essence. This is cynicism, and there is nothing good about it. Repeating the same thing, you lose the opportunity to reveal your sexuality, which can be acquired in a relationship. To you, it seems boring and uninteresting.
You are looking for an ideal partner.
What is an ideal? This is a mysticism, the product of the imagination, what you have invented yourself, and what is not always true. You can try to find it, but it is very likely to spend the whole life searching. Although, most likely, it will be better for you because adherence to the "ideal" is a sign of fear of intimacy with another person. In general, this is a huge stupidity because it greatly narrows the view of life and worldview. The brain sees only to what you have been accustomed, but nobody knows what is the best for you.
You are too rough-looking.
People make their opinion at the first look at clothes and sometimes even don’t try to assess the mind. Let's remember the ideals: have you ever seen people who dream of an untidy, ugly person with dirty greasy hair? It’s even hard to imagine. Such an attitude to yourself and to people around you is quite repulsive.
You don’t need anyone.
There is a tradition to play the role of a successful person. People are overworked with deeds, go somewhere, do something, refuse to meet referring to a lot of work, and if they come, they start showing off their relevance and success. People want to have a little heart-to-heart talk, and you tell them about your success. The person who is now in front of them seems to be very tired and happy and as if wants to say them, "I do not need anyone, I am happy being single."
Many people don’t even need to find any reasons to stay single, they just prefer this state more than having an open relationship or meeting and living with a person in one flat. No relationship will allow them to enjoy the desired freedom the way it can be done being single.
You have the whole bed.
One of the reasons to be single is a bed that is only at your disposal. Right next to you there are untouched and cool sheets, and you can lie with your arms and legs stretched out wide and there is even an extra pillow! The realization that now all this giant bed is only yours is something like a triumphant liberation. From that very moment, you cease to be abandoned, you begin to enjoy your own company. The pleasure of a bed without the ex is a symbol of your emancipation from them. Now you can sleep even diagonally and you will feel good.
You do not have to report to anyone.
It's nice and for somebody, it can become one of the main reasons to remain single. You can turn off the phone on the weekend. You can dance in an apartment. You can sit in the toilet as long as you want. You can stay at work if it is necessary without any excuses. You can go where you want. You can watch any movies that you like without discussing them with your partner. You can eat whatever you want without any prohibitions. You can spend as much time with your friends as you want and do not concern yourself with unnecessary information. You can flirt with strangers. And go to a club.
You don’t have any limits.
Being single is a gift and it is true. You should understand that and estimate the time being single before you again fall in love with someone. When you are single, you have almost limitless opportunities. Now every day can end unpredictably: in any place, in any company, at any time and there will be nobody to blame you for it. No commitment. No ties.
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