Why and Why Not Compromise in a Relationship: a Full Guide

Content:

1. What is a compromise in a relationship?
2. Is it always worth to make a compromise?
3. How can compromise help strengthen a relationship?
4. How to compromise in a relationship
5. Quotes about compromising

People are social creatures, and one can be happy only in a society of his/her kind. But even the closest people give us not only joy but also problems. And the harmony in relationships that we strive for sometimes seems unattainable. Relationships are a rather fragile thing that can be easily destroyed only by the unwillingness to make concessions. Today, we are going to talk about the importance of compromises and the ability to make them.

What is a compromise in a relationship?

Each person has their set of desires, and it’s completely normal to want something for yourself because we are all selfish by nature. During the courting period, under the influence of hormones in the body, a person is inclined to pay attention to the wishes of their romantic object more than to their own. This is called love. But such “chemistry” ends sooner or later, and you return to your natural state - when in fact everyone cares only about their own desires, and what does not correspond to them causes at first a slight indignation and then – open aggression.

Therefore, sooner or later, all couples face a situation where one expresses their opinion, and the other, if he/she has tolerated it before, now does not agree and expresses his/her point of view. So, there is a dispute, a quarrel, a scandal... and in the relationship appears a crack of misunderstanding.

Conflicts are an integral part of coexistence, and it must be admitted that it is impossible to do without them. Each person has their desires and habits, which often contradict the needs of a partner. And the closer we are to each other, the more intimate our communication, the more conflict points are there.

Not everyone understands the inevitability of these contradictions in romantic relationships. Sometimes both sides consider themselves right and seek to change the partner. This is an erroneous position. In any difficult situation of communication, you should look for a compromise.

Often compromising in relationships is considered as a weakness and a concession to the whims of the other, which is also completely wrong. Compromise is not a concession but a solution that is acceptable to both partners. A compromise solution is the opportunity to preserve the freedom of choice of each spouse, the ability to defend their principles, without prejudicing the interests of another person and creating conflict situations. It may not be the best solution from your point of view, but it will help to maintain peace and harmony in the relationship.

Is it always worth to make a compromise?

Is it necessary to make concessions in order to maintain relations? It is always difficult. People make compromises, again and again, each time trying not to make mistakes. As a result, some end up with nothing. Do you need to get over yourself for the sake of a loved one? Is it worth such sacrifices? Maybe you shouldn’t change and compromise with another person but just be who you are? Alas, firstly, it is not always possible to find a person who loves you exactly as you are. And secondly, if you even find a soul mate, it does not necessarily mean that you will have a happy life together and solve everyday problems easily. Each person is an individual. You still have to adapt to each other.

You need to learn how to make a compromise in a relationship without changing yourself so that it does not prevent you from developing spiritually or bring psychological discomfort. It is clear that accepting concessions, you do it for the sake of love for another person. But it does not mean that your understanding of happiness will coincide with the understanding of your loved one. When one of the partners does not satisfy their need for spiritual and psychological development, then over time you will have to solve this problem. Consequently, the less you discuss it, the stronger and more unexpected it arises for you later.

So, if someone feels insecurity, inferiority, or inability to love, then you should talk about it. Do not fear or avoid this conversation, much less ridicule the sincerity of the partner, it is more correct to find a compromise that will become the point of intersection with your partner.

An important role in conflicts between spouses is played by the peculiarities of male and female psychology and the different assessment of the same situations.

Representatives of the weaker sex have a more flexible psyche and often feel a strong emotional dependence on a man. Therefore, they tend to make concessions and prioritize over the interests of the husband. So, there are a lot of women in compromising positions. It is not always good, as it leaves an unpleasant aftertaste, creates an insult, and sometimes a sense of humiliation. Constant rejection of desires for the sake of male vanity causes irritation, which accumulates and eventually leads to a nervous breakdown or scandal.

To prevent it, one should not silently yield to a partner and reluctantly agree with the requirements of the spouse. You need to talk calmly and try to explain to your husband why his decision is unacceptable to you. But it is necessary to use precisely rational, logical arguments and keep emotions on a leash.

Men do not like female tears and hysterics, but they value and respect logic. Talk to your husband in a rational language - so he will quickly understand you and accept a compromise.

It can be concluded that concessions are necessary, despite the fact that sometimes it is psychologically difficult. Something can be solved with the help of a compromise, something cannot, the main thing to remember is that it is done for the sake of happiness and the preservation of love. But do not get over yourself and be humiliated, you should still have some pride. Is it worth it? You decide it for yourself. Most likely, yes, but it is important to remember that you do it for the sake of a loved one.

How can compromise help strengthen a relationship?

• Compromise satisfies both partners - someone more, someone less, but no one is offended.
• Compromise encourages you to communicate with a loved one, you share your feelings and thus get emotionally closer.
• In the search for a compromise, both of you tell each other what is important to you and what you can do without.
• The way you can find a compromise is the clearest indicator of feelings towards your loved one.
• The search for a compromise unites you as a couple, reminds that you are one team that builds relationships and a shared future.
• And finally - compromising in a relationship helps to understand what is really important in your life and what you cannot refuse under any circumstances. You should understand your scopes, and it is important that your partner knows them too.

How to compromise in a relationship

There is nothing more difficult for a person during communication than a conflict of interests. So many men, so many minds. We all evaluate events and the future development of the situation, relying on our knowledge and experience. There are many cases when couples break up due to different views on life, and at the same time, they do not make concessions to each other. Therefore, these 5 tips will help you learn how to make compromises in a relationship.

Compromise is not defeat

Women are so accustomed to being strong, purposeful, and powerful that deferring a man in something has become the recognition of their own powerlessness and weakness. But this is a misconception. To compromise with your beloved means to show him your love and respect. It is a proof that there are other values for you besides your desires.

Use the female wisdom

It’s not for nothing they say that women create coziness and comfort in the house, well-being and inner atmosphere in the family. Nature gave women wisdom, generosity, tolerance, and humility. Modern women do not want to be compliant and submissive, although, in fact, this is their main predestination. If the wife shows wisdom and smoothes the conflict with her husband, he will definitely make up for the loss somehow differently. That's the way the world wags. Opposites attract. You should not treat female submission as weakness or oppression of the individual self. For example, you can use the trump card of all women - cunning. Thus, each of the spouses fulfills their ambitions.

Use the method of “two weeks”

For example, you want to maintain the family budget in a different way, and your husband is skeptical about the proposal. Offer him to try your plan for two weeks and promise that if your idea turns out to be too expensive or inconvenient, you will return to the old version.

It is important! Men, as a rule, do not like changes and theorizing. It is best to convince them in practice.

Behave worthily

No matter how stubborn the interlocutor is, never raise your voice or engage in personalities. Be confident, calm, and self-composed. Even if the words of a man put you at a stand, do not get lost, ask questions and clarify what was heard.

Talk to your beloved one

It is important that two people can sit down and talk to each other. Just start practicing such an approach to solving problems. And after a while, you will notice that compromises are very easy to find and that conflicts disappear. It is easy to learn how to make compromises if you take into account the goals of a partner. Realizing what they want to get, you can find a mutually beneficial solution to a complex issue. Focusing only on your own needs and desires, you cannot offer a partner what they want. Because any option will reflect only your interests and not mutual ones.

Any conflicts are intended to bring people into even greater connection with each other. Therefore, the best solution to the controversial issues is to talk calmly and try to understand each other. Try to take this approach as early as possible, and then you will be able to experience all the beauty of family relationships!

Quotes about compromising

Over the years, the topic of compromise has been discussed by many scientists and famous people. Therefore, we have selected the best quotes about compromising.

Compromise and responsibility are the main components of a successful business.
Carlos Slim Helu

Everyone is dealing with something. We just have to love other people for who they are and hope they love us, too.
Claire Browne

I will give three dozen thugs for one person who can solve problems by talking.
Alphonse Gabriel Capone

As long as you are ready to make compromises, you can have a happy romance and marriage.
Madonna

A compromise is an art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece.
Ludwig Erhard

Of course, it is impossible to live without compromises. At work, in friendship, and in personal life, sometimes you have to make concessions. Most importantly, do not forget to take into account your own interests. If you just ignore the insults, crying yourself to sleep at night, then there is no question of any compromises. Love and respect yourself, know how to defend your point of view. Take a compromising position if you want it, but not at the will of another person. Remember that a romantic relationship and compromise go hand-in-hand, and true love is impossible without compromises.

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