They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus, so in other words, they are completely different creatures that have almost nothing in common. However, it is not true, especially when it is about unreasonable fears and slightly higher standards. The modern era has set its rules and made people believe that they are far from “imagined” ideal, and their bodies are not perfect, their smiles are not white enough, and eye wrinkles should be also immediately hidden or removed with Botox. We are used to thinking that these unfair standards are aimed specifically on women, but as practice shows, men become the victims of this “bubble” not less often.
As a result, people stop loving themselves, feel uncomfortable and not good enough to become happy. They believe that only “normal” weight in combination with perfect abs will allow them to enter the dating scene and meet someone worthy. Thus, many guys prefer to sit at home and forget even about online dating just because they are not “good enough” for that. Often, the same happens with girls. As a result, so many people from all over the world stay single and lonely because they don’t meet fake standards that have nothing to do with real life.
If you ask yourself whether it’s possible to become successful in dating being overweight, and you cannot decide on taking the first step, then it’s high time to study this issue and dot the i's and cross the t's.
We don’t know where that belief about certain women's preferences has come from, but it’s necessary to do something with it. Can you answer the simple question, “Do you think all people like pears? And if they have to choose between apples and pears what they will opt for?” Well, the answer to this question can become our long-awaited response. Different people like different things. Tastes differ, and you can do nothing about that. It’s one of the things that you can neither influence nor control. You can hardly even explain why you give preference to one thing instead of the other one.
So, talking about guys with excessive weight, it’s possible to notice that these fluffy bears are in great demand. There is one interesting peculiarity of female psychology that makes them pay attention to big guys and consider them attractive. Girls like to look small on the background of their men. And it’s pretty easy to do when a guy is big. This fact makes them feel safe on the subconscious level since such a man is a tower of strength to them. Getting back to modern standards, they have compelled us that a girl must be weaker, feminine and smaller than her boyfriend, and even the feminist movement cannot change this that easy. So, even girls with normal weight and bodies subconsciously look for bigger guys, and while bodybuilders start yielding ground, overweight guys become the most suitable option. Besides, body positivity has already started changing the vogue on skinny people as well as ones with model appearance. People have begun to understand that fake image is not the best example to follow. And such people have no fewer health problems than overweight ones, but having a relationship with the later ones, you shouldn’t worry about one extra piece of cake, and can just enjoy your life.
This is why so many girls choose overweight guys over bodybuilders and even ordinary guys. Besides, some people don’t want to complicate their lives, so they choose the path of least resistance. For example, you like to cook hearty dishes and sweets, and you don’t want to give up these things and start cooking just fish and salads, that's why you look for a like-minded person who will be glad to share your tastes and will praise you for every tasty dish.
There are also girls (even with model appearance) who like overweight guys and consider them handsome and hot. So, as we have already said, tastes differ, so “Every Jack has his Jill.”
If everything was that perfect and cloudless, then every second guy would start actively gaining weight and “increase” his chances of success in such a way. But, as everyone knows, a coin has two sides, and the thing that some girls like big guys doesn’t change the fact that you may run into numerous pitfalls, having excessive weight. Thus, it’s necessary to weigh all the pros and cons to see the whole picture and understand what challenges you may face and what you should be ready for. Forewarned is forearmed, so the following things will not become a big surprise for you.
However, anyway, don’t forget that you have always a chance to change everything you want, raise your self-esteem and create a new “improved” version of yourself. Everything is only up to you.
1. You may not attract everyone
As we have said “tastes differ,” and not everyone will consider you to be attractive. It’s a normal thing, and even people with ordinary stature face such a problem. So, you shouldn’t expect that a girl you like will necessarily have mutual feelings toward you. Accept this fact and don’t pay too much attention. You can run into 10 people who don’t consider you attractive before meeting one worthy. Everything will depend on your fortune and how lucky you are.
2. You may meet people who will try to humiliate you
You might have already faced such situations in ordinary life when someone tries to offend you or even humiliate just because you look a bit different. Some people don’t like the ones who stand out from the crowd. Their inner complexes, low self-esteem in combination with a bad temper turn them into abusers who try to prove their value at the expense of others. And overweight guys are a perfect target. So, be ready that when you enter an online dating scene, you may still face the same troubles as in ordinary life.
3. Your low self-esteem may become a stumbling block
It often happens that people with excessive weight suffer from low self-esteem and feel extremely unconfident during communication with the representatives of the opposite sex. However, the main trap is that people don’t realize the true reason for their failures. They assure themselves that the whole problem is about weight due to which they look not that attractive. Such an attitude just makes the situation worse, and a man finds himself in a vicious circle from which he cannot find a way out. So, the problem remains unsolved because even girls who don’t see anything wrong about their appearance, don’t want to continue their communication.
4. Your range of options is small
The thing that you are overweight suggests that you might be not a very active person but rather a homebody, who prefers to spend the evening at home in a comfortable atmosphere where you don’t need to worry about how you look. There is nothing wrong with it, but such a lifestyle narrows down the range of possible options where you can meet and get acquainted with a potential partner. It’s obvious that your workplace and circle of friends are not suitable opinions, otherwise, you will not spend your time reading this article. And if you don’t like to attend different crowded places, then online dating becomes the most reasonable and convenient variant.
5. You may have serious health problems
You might have heard a lot of times that everything should be in moderation, and if something is beyond the norm, it can lead to unpleasant consequences and health problems. According to statistics, it is one of the main reasons why many girls refuse dating overweight guys. When girls are interested exactly in committed relationships and not just in a one-night stand, they have a serious approach to choosing their future partner. They consciously and subconsciously think about their future offspring. Nobody wants to be with a person who, in their opinion, doesn’t care about their health and doesn’t want to watch their appearance. Besides, often, these people think that if a man doesn’t care about himself, then how will he be able to take care of the partner? This is already a red flag.
If you are living in the USA, you know that excessive weight has already become some type of norm. In the streets, you can meet many happy couples in which one or both partners have excessive weight, but this fact doesn’t prevent them from loving each other. If you are single and want to finally meet your beloved partner, you should carefully analyze your life and find the main weak spots. What are the main issues that don’t allow you to meet a worthy person? If you think that weight is your main enemy, and everything else is just perfect - stop deceiving yourself. What are your character traits that can cause trouble? Do you have bad habits? What is your lifestyle? Why are you overweight? Do you feel comfortable with it? Give honest answers to all these questions. Do that for yourself, nobody is going to check them or laugh at you, but the thoughtful analysis will become the first step towards great changes.
Work on your style and look sharp
The thing that you are overweight doesn’t change the fact that you should still look sharp to attract charming girls. Self-neglect looks much worse than excessive weight. You should “wrap yourself” in the right package to draw attention and look nice. Nowadays, you can find a tremendous number of great things for overweight people, so the thing that you wear clothes that neither suit you nor highlight your advantages doesn’t have an excuse. Everyone likes well-groomed people, and they have bigger chances to succeed both in online and offline dating. It’s possible to turn a blind eye to excessive weight, but untidiness is repulsive and definitely not attractive.
Care about your health
As we have already mentioned, many girls don’t want to date overweight guys because of their health problems and potential negative effect on their future children. Yes, when girls start dating, they don’t exclude the possibility of creating a family with you, and the fact that you neglect your health, being overweight, makes them step back and look for someone else. So, if you want to become a “player” in this game, you should have a normal complexion, and in general, look healthy as much as possible. You can be overweight, but you shouldn’t be obese because this is a completely different thing.
Try not to gain more weight
To a certain extent, overweight people look attractive almost for everyone, the next category attracts fewer people, and when people move from the “overweight” category into “obese” one, their chances to meet a worthy partner become pretty low. The thing is that obese people look very unhealthy in general, and everyone understands how many problems are hidden behind this “armor.” So, one way or another, you should try to control calorie consumption and watch your weight because one day you can wake up and not recognize yourself in a mirror. Excessive weight can change your appearance, facial expression and the way you treat yourself, so you should be careful and not cross that fine line.
Develop your inner world
When everything is more or less clear about a person’s appearance (people need just a few minutes to draw their first conclusions), it’s interesting to find out the inner world of the person. A guy with a perfect body but the empty soul will lose to an overweight man with a rich inner world. It’s a law that always works. So, if you want to become an interesting interlocutor, you should develop yourself, learn new things and, in general, expand your horizons. When a man attracts with his sense of humor and intelligence, his appearance takes a back seat. Nowadays, you have endless possibilities to improve your skills, learn something new and become a person with whom it’s interesting to share thoughts around the clock.
Be a charismatic interlocutor
This point is a smooth continuation of the previous one because charisma is a great instrument in winning any girl over. Charisma is an ability to maintain the conversation, being an attentive listener and a fascinating storyteller. It can help you in different situations, and it is the thing that makes the girls consider you the smartest and most handsome man in the whole area. It’s charisma that helps an interlocutor notice your numerous advantages and turn a blind eye to your drawbacks. So, if you will be able to develop it and become a charismatic companion, your chances of success will be extremely high and prosperous.
Don’t demand athletic shapes from girls
If you cannot boast of the athletic body yourself, then it’s obvious that you cannot demand it from others. If you meet a wonderful person who accepts you as you are, then try to be happy and accept the partner as well. Nobody is perfect in this world, and even girls who look at you from the covers of glossy magazines, very often look different in life. Photoshop and other photo editors help create a perfect image that people are looking in life, but it’s fake. So, the best thing you can do is to enjoy your life as it is without any unreasonable requests and statements.
Sometimes, dating becomes a challenge for people with an ordinary physique, and when it comes to plus size dating, everything can be even more complicated. The biggest problem is the negative attitude of other people, which can spoil the mood and ruin the desire to start dating when overweight. Unfortunately, many people are bullied. And if you are an overweight single who is searching for true love and a committed relationship, you will unlikely have a desire to get unpleasant and offensive messages. You want to forget about your weight and just enjoy communication with other people. You can do that if you try dating sites for overweight singles, where people don’t judge others for their looks. There are top 5 best plus size dating apps and sites that will help you get the most out of overweight dating.
1. LargeFriends
It is the most popular overweight dating website that has been functioning since 2001. It is simple and user-friendly. Here people of different sizes focus on meeting their one and only. It’s well-known among people who are interested in dating for overweight, and your chances to find someone special here are very high.
2. BB People Meet
This overweight dating site has been successfully working since 2002. It helps people of different body types, races and age groups find their soulmates and start committed relationships. Users don’t pay much attention to the size of clothes because they understand that this number cannot become a stumbling block on the way to happiness. So, you can start dating a plus size girl without any further ado.
3. Chubby Bunnie
This is a great dating site for overweight people who usually feel awkward when meeting new people and have problems with making friends. Here you can finally relax and forget about your shyness. This dating platform gathers like-minded people who are searching for their happiness and dream about the creation of a real family.
4. BBW Cupid
If you are going to be involved in overweight online dating, then this site can become a perfect option. Its name speaks for itself. Numbers play the last role when you fall in love with someone amazing. People with a rich inner world look much more attractive than slender ones with rotten souls. Here you can meet users from different age categories. It is more than a decade of experience that will help you make your dreams come true.
5. BBW Date Finder
If you are overweight and dating has become your priority, you should definitely try this site. It provides plus size people with a big range of different features as well as a great opportunity to meet their beloved partners. It’s a site with a long and successful history of matchmaking.
According to the survey on sexual contacts in which more than 60 thousand people of different sexes took part, overweight men are much more consistent with the female ideal than those with a lean or normal physique.
Psychologists believe that this happens because women perceive an overweight man as a strong and wealthy defender while slender ones do not create such an effect. So, the fact that you haven’t met your soulmate yet suggests that you should analyze your life, make some improvements and try online dating, having considered the above-mentioned tips. Nowadays, there is a huge number of different plus size dating apps and sites, so you will surely find something to your taste.